Dilemmas
by clarissadele
Summary: In which Clarke's band goes on tour and Bellamy really isn't all that happy about it.


_So, hey everyone! I have another oneshot here, (I know it's been a while)! This fic was actually a birthday present for my friend. My beta didn't get a chance to look at it, so all errors are on me. Enjoy_

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He'll admit after the fact, that throwing a chair across the room was probably not the best possible response when Clarke told him her 'big news.' But what else in god's name was Bellamy supposed to do when his best friend—not to mention his _roommate_ told him that she was leaving to go on tour with her band? What was he supposed to do without her? How was he supposed to _pay rent_ without her?

He eagerly voiced these complaints to Clarke, who replied snarkily by promising to still pay her half of the rent. What was he supposed to do without her? Well, "the dishes go in the dishwasher and the milk is in the fridge, Bellamy, Jesus."

But dammit, Bellamy was going to miss her. He was so used to seeing Clarke's face everyday around the apartment, and before that, everyday at either his or her childhood home. They were the dynamic duo, the two of them. They gave their teachers hell, and had their landlord threatening to kick them out within the first two months of living in their apartment. One wasn't the same without the other.

In part, he really couldn't blame Clarke. This was her dream, not to mention that of his little sister, who just so happened to be in the band. Bellamy tried not to focus on the fact that they were both leaving him. His two best girls. Silently, though, he had always believed in the band, from the moment they started practicing in Jasper Jordan's smelly garage, and he was invited to watch. He couldn't blame any of them for wanting to live out the dream they had all had for _Sworn Enemies_. Yet he still did.

For the first few months, he refused to answer any of Clarke's text messages, calls or emails. Even when she went as far to poke him on Facebook, (which, who even _does_ that?), he ignored her. He knew that she must be getting fed up with him, as was evident when she stopped trying to communicate with him, but _who did she think she was_ just springing this on him? And, yes, he knew it had been months and he should probably get over it, _and_ it wasn't even completely her fault, but he still blamed her for the emptiness she left in his heart.

But they were just friends, right? It had been that way this whole time, hadn't it? Neither of them had ever wanted or needed anything more from the other. He was happy with being her best friend who happened to be a male, and she was content with scolding him about the countless women that he would bring back to their apartment, night after night. "This is my apartment, too, and I'm getting really tired of making small talk in _our_ kitchen with all of your nightly flings!" she had once told him.

Maybe that was the time his feelings had began to change, he finally allowed himself to think. The way that her face seemed to swell with anger. Clarke definitely had a mouth on her, that was for sure, but he had never thought it would be the thing that got him hooked on her.

So, it was that night, when Clarke and the others would be coming back to play at a local theatre near the end of the tour, that Bellamy decided he would go. Sure, he's admitted his feelings to himself, but he wants to be able to stand there in the crowd when he first sees her again, so he won't have to worry about making a fool of himself. They'd known each other way too long, and if the first time he saw her again he would have to face her head on, she would know something was up.

No, his friendship with Clarke wasn't something he was willing to risk over his stupid one-sided feelings. So he'd stand in the crowd, be able to get a good look at her, and pull his shit together before actually having to _speak_ to her, and then forget that the moment at the concert ever happened. Perfect.

Now, standing in the middle of the theatre with a bunch of other people who were _actually_ here to see the band—and don't get him wrong, he was—Bellamy felt like he was about to jump off a bridge or something. The band was supposed to be coming on stage within the next few minutes, and to say he wasn't nervous as hell would be the largest fucking lie he would ever tell.

Before he even noticed what was happening, the band was coming on stage, and my god, there she was. Standing in her aura of I-won't-take-your-shit, with her guitar in hand, stood Clarke. Bellamy watched motionlessly as Octavia, his sister and also the lead singer, introduced the rest of the band; Jasper Jordan on drums, Monty Green on keyboard, Raven Reyes on the bass, and of course, Clarke Griffin on lead guitar.

Bellamy continued to watch as they powered through the first few songs in their set. Then Clarke switched guitars, and they easily transitioned into a slower song, and Bellamy found himself staring at Clarke's fingers as she picked away at her guitar strings. She was mesmerizing, and it was then that Bellamy knew he was in deep.

Eventually, the concert picked up again, and Bellamy once again found himself among people whistling and going wild for _Sworn Enemies_. It was crazy to see them go from arguing in Jasper's garage over what type of music they would play, to standing on the largest stage in their small town.

It had to be the second last song of their set, where everything started to go downhill. It was right in the middle of the song—Bellamy knew it well, and he knew that Clarke's guitar solo would be coming soon. He saw her look up to do a quick scan of the crowd before her big moment. His first mistake was looking right back into her eyes when she caught sight of him. And, boy, was she shocked to see him there.

Out of all the things that Bellamy had thought could happen that night, this was not one of them. Clarke Griffin was so shocked at the sight of him, that she completely froze. The music stopped coming from her guitar just as her mouth dropped open. And, boy, did Bellamy gape right back at her. Along with the rest of the audience. They stayed like that, staring at eachother, for a good ten seconds before she tried to pick up where she left off. Bellamy chanced a quick glance at the faces of the rest of the band, appearing to be just as shocked by their guitarist's stutter, before allowing his eyes to focus back on her.

Clarke was still staring right at him as she played, her angry eyes feeling as though they could pierce a hole in his skull. She had every right to be mad at him, he told himself. He was a complete _dick_ for ignoring her like that, but hey, there wasn't a handbook on what to do when thinking you might love your best friend. Yet he still found himself unable to stay there with Clarke looking at him like that. He just couldn't do it, because Bellamy Blake finally had his feelings sorted out, and he'd be damned if she ever found out.

Slowly but surely, he pushed his way through the crowd of people. He could see the exit door from where he was. He took one more look back to the stage. Clarke's expression had changed, and if she was upset by his actions, she was doing a pretty damn good job at hiding it. He turned back and left quickly.

As soon as he got outside the theatre, however, Bellamy found himself unable to move. He stopped by a bench outside the theatre, and sat. He didn't know how long he was there for, but he knew the concert must have been over when he received a text from Octavia. _Meet me around behind the theatre,_ it read. Bellamy stood up, and headed that way. He saw the shadow before he turned the corner, and found himself fearing what she had to say.

The voice that greeted him, though, while still familiar, was not his sister's. "I thought about texting you from my phone, but I didn't know you would come," Clarke explained quietly. Her arms were crossed over her chest, and she was now wearing a jacket to protect herself from the cold winter weather.

"I—Clarke," he tried.

"Oh, save it. What the hell are you doing here Bellamy? After months without hearing from you, you show up out of the blue at one of our shows? And then to top it all off, you can't even get over your anger at me for leaving on this tour long enough to stay the whole time? I wasn't the only one there, you know! Your sister was there too!"

"You think I'm still mad at you for leaving?" Bellamy asked.

"Well why the hell else would you show up just to storm out? Do you not realize how much this means to us!"

Bellamy ignored her question. "Wait. You stopped playing. You never stop playing in the middle of a song, no matter what happens."

"Seriously? Out of everything, that's what you choose to focus on?" Clarke asked him incredulously, throwing her hands up in the air.

"But what happened?"

"You took me by surprise, okay? It all comes back to the fact that you haven't even _spoken_ to me for months, and now you show up here like this and I had to see you out there—"

"You weren't supposed to see me!" Bellamy yelled, and instantly, he wanted to take it back.

"Oh? And why wasn't I?"

"Because I don't want to ruin our friendship," he whispered. The angry look dropped from Clarke's face, and was quickly replaced with confusion. _Well, there's no going back now._ Gently, Bellamy grasped both of her shoulders and stared her straight in the eyes.

"I'm falling for you, Clarke," he said in all sincerity. "But we've been friends for so long, and I can't wreck that." He could tell she was surprised, that much was for certain, but she wiped her face clean pretty quickly, something he knew that she was good at.

"Bellamy," she started. "Ask me out."

"I—what?"

"Ask me out."

"Uh, okay. Clarke, would you like to go out for drinks sometime?" It was then that she smiled brightly at him.

"Yes, I would." And because the girl was full of surprises, she leaned up, grasping his shoulders now, and kissed his cheek. "For the record, though, I don't think you're going to ruin anything," she said before disappearing back inside the building. Bellamy lifted his hand to his cheek, then quickly realized what he was doing, and moved it back down to his side. Well, damn.

At least he wouldn't need to find a new roommate any time soon.


End file.
